Payday!

Finally. I've come to a decision. Yeah. Great. No regrets. No turning back.

Its been a really stressful week for me. Glad its all over. And! There's something to celebrate today! Its PAYDAY! Seemed like a lifetime since my last payday, and I've torturing myself under a LB (low-budget) lifestyle for... em, at least 2 mths? Now its time to CELEBRATE! Yay yay!

I'm a happy gal once more!

Met Jingjing and we both treated ourselves to a sumptuous dinner at Fish & Co. (so Nono, u understand y I had violent objections to going there again this Fri?) Ohh... Yummy! Tried to do some shopping but didn't see anything I fancied. Ended up getting groceries and toiletries for home again. My Ah Soh nature.

I'm going Simei tmr! Getting Rara's medication and " shun bian " go "bio" cute guy at optical shop. *Wolf calls*

Okie lah, going to "bio" cute guy at optical shop and "shun bian" get medication for Rara.

Yup, 2 entries a day. Dats how free I am.

I am waiting for an important call right now and is getting damn frustrated and restless dat that someone hasn't called. The fire's burning up to my ass and my fireman hasn't arrived yet. I've got a real important decision to make tmr and is betting all my chips on the advice dat that someone's gonna give me.

Aaaaaahhhhhh.........

Pek chek.

I hate making decisions. Because I hate making wrong ones. And I ALWAYS make wrong ones. I hate messing up my life. And I ALWAYS mess up my life.

I'm a loser.

Warning: Super Yuan Entry

Its the usual Sunday afternoon. Sleep in, wake up, eat brunch, watch tv, surf net, blog, eat dinner, watch tv, get the Monday blues, iron clothes, sleep.

Well, the life of a singleton. Not exactly a fufilling and exciting one, huh? But, I pretty much enjoy it. No aim, no care, no stress, no one to call, no one calls, no dates, no admirers, no boyfriend, no love.... Argh! Stop me! I wanna lament about life again!

Its nice to know you have all the freedom in the world to do wat u want, hear wat u want, see wat u wan and feel wat you wan. No connecting of any emotional strings to anyone. No hurt, no grieve, no depression, no anger, no waste of precious tears for someone who thinks from waist down. Not bad sia.

But, (I thought of this for a long time) I really DO miss getting hurt, depressed, angry, and crying over someone! I really do. I miss all that are associated with loving someone. SOMEBODY! LOVE ME, HURT ME!!!

Its been so long and I am so afraid I am gonna forget how it is like, to be in love. I am so afraid that I'll lose that feeling, and someday, I'll never wanna get it back. Resistance to belief in true love. Yeah.

I'll get so blinded by the cruelties of this world and eventually get convinced dat fairy tales are strictly fantasy. And only privileges that God has arranged for wat the world had perceived to be "fair" ladies.

I'll just be the fat, ugly and wicked witch who's banished to the end of the world. Detested, forsaken, separated and very soon, forgotten, by all mankind. Concocting love potions to separate couples in love and selling them to other fat & ugly witches like me, plotting evil schemes with my evil sidekick(Rara) and eventually dying vengeful and lonely.

I've thought it through. Maybe it was just not meant to be. SOMEONE's gotta be the evil witch. No evil, where got good? No vengeful spinsters, where got lovey-dovey couples? Life's gotta be balanced.

You couples blissfully in love, you gotta thank me! Without me sacrificing at the other end of the scale, all of you probably would have drowned.

Are All ABNNs Smelly?

Hypothesis:

All ABNNs (Ah Bu Neh Nehs) are smelly.

Test:

*LC(low-class) ABNN sitting beside me on the bus. Got smell?

**HC(high-class) ABNN sitting beside me in the office. Got smell?

Legend:
*meaning bangala who do physical work for a living. English vocab limited to "how much?", "rice and curry only & takeaway" and "thank you". Hold hands with male fellow countrymen.

** meaning ABNN who works as a high ranking executive in MNC. Expatriate in Singapore. Speaks proper English with an American accent.

Results:

LC ABNN- Positive

HC ABNN- Positive

Conclusion:

All ABNNs are smelly.

Pictures!

Hey Yo, hey yo! Here are some outdated pics!



Not a very clear pic, but make do lah! See, my poor thumb...


Side view. Swollen sia.

The below are some sky pics I took for Lao Huu. But tink they're real nice and so decided to post them up.







All three taken while I was waiting for my bus in the morning.

Life is so beautiful.

You'll realise it if you could juz stop watever you're doing and, for a moment, "see" and "feel" it with your heart.

SUAY Queen Returns

I had one of the worst start of the week in 20 years. I could easily have entered this day for my Primary School composition writing, titled "The Unluckliest Day of My Life".

First, I woke up late. Opened my eyes and AAAHHH... It was all bright and sunny already! Jumped outta bed (No, I did not wake my neighbours downstairs) and Woosh~ Got my fat ass out of my hse in 20 mins. Because of this, Rara missed her breakfast. She tried the "Puppy Eyes" trick. Too bad, I am a lousy Jie Jie.

Made it in time for the 7.50am bus, all was smooth and steady until I changed bus at after Seletar Camp. It was all a mistake right from the start. I shouldn't have took dat first step. The entire bus was like a SAUNA! Imagine, the air-con's emitting hot air loh! Wah lau, like wat Nono says, this time I really "Han4 Bao3 Bao3" (Sweaty Baby, which means Hamburger too). Fanned myself like an Aunty with my ez-link card. Yah, the effect's barely noticeable. No use actually, but I figured out it was a psychological thingy.

The 20 mins bus ride felt like it lasted a lifetime. Woo, finally, my ordeal was over. Fresh air!

There was more ambush for me in office. Tried to adjust the height of my chair and OUCH! I pricked my thumb into the nails of my chair! I gotta give it credit for waking me up man! Didn't realised how deep a cut it was until it keep bleeding profusely and wouldn't stop even after I put it under a running tap. Yes, it hurts BIG TIME.

Had no plaster with me because I forgot to refill my supply after using up the last one for a blister. KNS. Pressed on the wound with a tissue and finally, it stopped bleeding. I am such a first-aid expert.

But, the hurt remains and now I can't even hold a pen... *grouchy*

Dat was not all. Wanted to get my daily dose of Milo, especially today because I was late and had no time for breakfast. The Milo machine was spoilt!!! Suay! SUay! SUAY AH! Only sugar and bits of milo-looking powder came out!

This plot could easily get me a prize in the East Zone Primary School Essay Competition 2005.

Fans! More Blogging Tmr k?

Hey yo hey yo...

Had a bad day at work and have so many woes to pour out but I simply have no time to elaborate now.

I have a conference call at 10pm (Yes, 10PM. Nope, not video conference because I dun have my network set up at hme yet. Yes, dial in from home. Nope, cannot claim. Yes. Toll-free.) later with the US pple and thus gotta go get prepared for it soon.

I also think the timing suck. Wat to do? Who asked me to work in an MNC? And its a WEEKLY conference loh! Wah leu... I cannot imagine working for more than 12 hours every Wednesday. And, And, I have to attend a conference call in office at 8AM the next day!!! (Weekly one also.) Work late and start early the next day. KNS.

Updates on Rara

Realised I haven been updating you all on Rara these few days, so this entry's specially for those concerned.

She was getting better until last Sat. Well, all my fault. Coz I didn't do a good job in tying her head collar tightly enough and it came off for quite a while. Luckily Mummy discovered it just before she was leaving the hse and got scoundrel to help her secure it back. However, damages are still done. Her wound got all red and some of the healing skin came off. Ouch!

There's something else bothering me. Rara's been having pinkish urine for the past week. Thot it was blood initially, but tink its too light to be blood leh. But it could be a little blood diluted with her urine. Oh no... blood in urine seems rather serious! But I am damn broke leh. No more money to send her to vet. Hope she can tahan till next mth.

Aiyo... I am so gek sim by all these happening to her...

When issit gonna end? Aaaaaahhhhh...........................

"Yuanster" My Foot!

Before I start, I wanna jump up and down joyfully for 20 times first! (Warning: Neighbours staying on 5th floor and below, please evacuate first.)

Something really wonderful happened to me today! I was so damn shocked but I tink I reacted quite well. Hee. But, but, I'm gonna keep it a secret first, will announce BIG BIG and LOUD LOUD when things have actualised and stablised. Those of you pple who already had the sneak preview to it, better keep ya mouth shut! Or else...

And and! I got a fat Angpow (I expect $4 only lah, but its more, more, more!) from my Team Leader! Woohoo~

Hey, I got a couple of comments on my blog! But then hah, u fans out there, can leave your name not? Esp when you leave your comments like u noe me for the past century. Sound so familiar but I still cannot figure out who!

My Brain: "Hah! This person used a lot of lahs and lehs! Muz be A! Eh, no, B also uses a lot of these lahs and lehs leh... okie, so its B. Hey! But C spells her "and" in this way... But den it could be D also leh... coz got grammar mistakes. Maybe E also? Maybe F? Ah hah! Its G lah! Who else so bo liao? Hahaha... I'm so smart... eh, but G married a Martian and migrated to Mars 2 years back leh. WAH LAU! DEN WHO LAH??"

See? I am so confused I am pulling all my hair out! No amt of Yun Nam can save me! Me, although very smart, would prefer to put my precious, high quality brain cells for better use. If u dun wan me to look like "Sam Seng" in Bookworm Club, please sign off. Can not???

And who was the one who suggested I name my blog " Yuanster"? Huh? Huh? Call yourself Anonymous somemore. But I know who you are! I killed like 800 million brain cells and spent 50 light years before I came up with such a "chim" name. You wan me to give it up and change it to some SWA KU and "tu3" name like "Yuanster"?

Fat hope.

By the way, pple who yuan are expected to live longer because research have shown that you cut your life span back by at least 10 years if you bottle up all your feelings and emotions. My pact with DT and Takeshi's still on, so I have to make sure I stay alive wat.

Wats more, I do not yuan (grouch) ALL the time. For those of you who know me well, I am one BUBBLY, CHEERFUL, JOYFUL, OPTIMISTIC gal. Rite rite? (I can visualise u all nodding. Good.) I just get bad experiences and meet ill-mannered pple. To prove my pt, scroll up and read my first and second and third paragraph. Any bit of grouchiness in it? I told you I am one happy gal.

Bloody Rude Angmoh

I am boiling inside and I needa bitch about it before I erupt!

Some F***ing fool pulled out my internet cable when I juz left my desk for about an hour! Without asking for my permission! So bloody rude.

Tamade.

I wanted to stay connected one loh! Today is the BIG day leh! Sicali got "shy" pple wanna ask me out on a date via email, msn, icq, watever, den how? Are you gonna provide for me for the rest of my life??? Made me restart my msn and email somemore. Dunno how to ask also. Wah leu. If cannot find me den dun use lah. Use someone else's lah! Brainless freak!

And some other Angmoh dared to come and tell me, "Hey, my mate stole your cable juz now..."

Mate his head lah! Here not Kangeroo Land leh. Mate, mate... Pui lah!

Still dare to remind me he STOLE it from me. YES! He STOLE loh. (Taking without permission is STEALING.)

Whoever dat "mate is, he shd thank his lucky stars I didn't get to SEE him yet ah! If not I'll use my Body Slam and Flying Thunder Thighs on him. "Watch out, MATE!"

I am feeling less grouchy because I'm savouring a cup of Meiji Yoghurt with Mixed Fruits (Yummy!). Nice.

Dumb Angmoh! U heng ah! This cup of yoghurt's your benefactor.

P/S: Kaoz, INSENSITIVE DC attempted to let me lunch alone again! Luckily my teamleader saved me. FYI, DC, in case you were comtemplating to make my life at Wonderland sucky by letting me lunch alone, YOU HAVE FAILED. LOSER.

Abundant Harvest Everyone?

Time flies this holidays huh? Seems like I was damn busy but frankly speaking, I have no idea what I was busy with. Nope, not the CNY visiting dats tiring me out. In fact, I was done with it during the first 2 days. Reason being, I only have 2 places to go to (maternal and paternal grandparents' hses). Dats all.

Haven't had much luck with mahjong this year. Won $0.60 and $1.70 at SS's and SK's hse respectively. But lost $33 at Shu Shu's hse just now! Ahhhh... so SUAY! KNS. Poor Zolzol, gotta eat bread and skip lunch for the rest of this month. God's will to make me lose some weight.

Went supper after the mahjong session with Shu Shu, ST and RL. Wooh, so much to catch up on!Updated RL who has been MIA-ing for so long. Heehee, got some interesting updates too. BUT, I am not at the liberty to tell! Too bad. Ha.

Ah Bui's been away for overseas training for only 2 days and I'm missing him already! I so regretted not pulling myself outta bed and sending him off the other day. I'm under the "won't-wake-up-unless-my-hse's-on-fire" curse. I didn't get to say BYE! My dear Ah Bui. Although I cannot stand the fact that he sometimes wears my T-shirt and claimed that they are too big for him (too big dun wear lah!), hogs the PC whenever he's hme, think my cooking sucks and refuses to read my blog. I still miss him! At least he's one of those few pple who doesn't haunt me to lose weight, lets me have my way upon the first sign of my whinning and best of all, eats what I cooked despite the fact he tinks its terrible! I wonder how he's doing. Hmm...

Tink Mummy misses him more lah. Coz she used to call him everyday when he was in camp. YES. EVERYDAY. She calls me at the office everyday too. Okie. Fair. Now dat he's not at home, I'm the baby at home. Haha. Enjoying while I can.

Gong Xi Gong Xi

Rooster year's back! Time really flies. The last time where all streets were decorated with rooster-related stuff was like em, 12 years ago? Dat was the year when I took my PSLE! Wah lau leh, looking back, I am so damn old now! So many things have happened like these 12 years. I got my "O"s, "A"s, Degree, knew my frens from Sec sch, jc and Uni (many turned into confidates), numerous crushes, tried my first go at make-up, attended my first prom, my first RA show, my first overseas trip without family, my first job, blah, blah.

Well, some things never change though.

I still like pink, I still am infatuated with Takeshi, I still hate durians, I'm still fat, I still am looking for LOVE!

Relax, relax, Zolynn, Rrrrreeeelllaaaxxx....

okie, change topic. I am not gonna start lamenting about life again.

Let's talk about something happy!

Well, other than remembering CNY for the season where I gotta get interrogated by all SUPER-CONCERNED grannies, aunties and uncles as to when I'm gonna get hitched and the opening sentences "Oh my, you've grown fatter this year!". CNY's got its attractiveness too.

Lotsa goodies at home! My Mummy's always got the "I-am-feeding-an-army-at-home-so-I-gotta-fill-up-all-cabinets-and-fridge-with-food" syndrome whenever the sound of spring knocks. I've got supply enough to last me 3 months. Yay! Food gorging time! Yah, yah, hanah, hanah, control, control. I can imagine pple like JS telling me this , "Better dun eat too much ah, you're getting fatter already. Always say wanna jian fei, but still dun wanna control. Blah blah" k lah, k lah. Got it lah.

Something else to look forward to: Ang Pows!

Woo hoo~ I still consider it a privilege. Haha. I expect better ang pow biz this year, coz I attended like a 101 wedding dinners last year! Its pay back time! Wait a min, did someone say newly weds can choose not to give ang pows for the first year? Oei! Dats so unfair! It muz be the newly weds who came up with this themselves! How can? How can? Sicali I get married this year how? Huh huh? Den I damn Luu Gi leh! KNS. K, juz read my horoscope for Rooster Year 2005. No romance luck. Alright, at least no luu gi so much.

Haha, first Angpow! From Mummy! I noe how much lah. Standard one. Same amount for like 20 years already. But its okie lah, for the significance can liao. She reminded me a zillion times dat I gotta put it in my pocket and sleep with it. For good luck lah. K, noted.

Oh no! Its gonna be 12 am soon! Aiyah! I still got grooming to do! Tmr cannot touch scissors and other sharp objects. Damn.

Gotta fly.

Happy Chinese New Year!

AAS #001: Something About You

Welcome to this very first issue on Aunt Aggie Says (AAS), published on every first Saturday/Sunday of the month.

Here, I share my opinions on BGR. Very often, I play the role of "Aunt Aggie" to people around me, like colleagues, friends and family. Don't ask me why. I am intrigued too. I am a greenhorn when it comes to relationships, simply cannot stand sobbing gals and wishy-washy guys. Thus, to counter the increasing amount of people coming to me for advice, I decided to create a "Aunt Aggie Says" column, where I would give opinions and advice on common BGR problems. Hopefully this will help!

Without further ado (I know you are excited), I shall begin.


I always tell myself that things happen for a reason. And that songs were not written out of nowhere too. I don't know if you guys and gals have heard of this song, "Something About You" by Five for Fighting.

The chorus goes like this:
Baby there's something about you that
I can hold on to
I'm going to hold on to that

If I interpret it correctly, it means that there is always this something about your special someone that made you hold on, despite the fact that sometimes it strikes you that he or she is not and will not be someone you could walk hand in hand with, for the rest of your life.

I have heard of many cases of people hanging on, even after their their boyfriends or girlfriends cheated on them, abuse them physically or verbally, stood them up and etc, numerous times. And some eventually marry them! Why? Why? Why? Each time it happened, gals would cry and guys would get dead drunk, then they tell themselves and everyone else that THIS time its REALLY going to be OVER and guess wat? They appear at weekend gatherings together with their partners, ever so lovey-dovey again!

I always tell myself that courtship is merely means that both parties are just "trying things out" and if either one finds that something is simply so wrong (it has to be wrong because if it was right it wouldn't have hurt you so many times), he or she could just walk out.

Yah yah, its so damn easy for me to say, because I haven't been through it. Its just so hard when you're in it. All those good times you shared, all those sweet things he or she has done for you, all those times where he or she would cry and beg you to stay, and tell you how much he or she regretted what they've done. Please! These are all bullshit!

Notice that I used the PAST tense? "shared", "done", "would"? Its all past, get over it! Besides, the fact that it was the "nth" time it happened only means that your boyfriend or girlfriend do not treasure and remisice the good and sweet times like you do. If not, they would have thought twice before repeating it. They know its going to hurt you. Regrets are meant to be taken as learning lessons. The fact that one could regret the same thing over and over again only means that the regret is not painful enough for them to remember. Ha! So the conclusion is, boys and girls, its been a one-man or one-woman show all along.

Number 1 Piece of advice(POA) from Aunt Aggie's Manual(AAM): Its takes 2 hands to clap.

Things are not going to work out if you are the only one really working on the relationship. Its ABOUT the 2 of you. Its going be only a matter of time before you cannot take the strain and give up.

Yes yes yes, you LOVE him or her and you can't live without him or her.

Number 2 POA from AAM: Love, like everything else in this world, is NOT ETERNAL. It transforms into committment, habits (many couples become used to each other), and companionship.

Number 3 POA from AAM: Death will come to nobody just because he or she has lost a loved one. This world is so filled with love, romantic, motherly, fatherly, brotherly, sisterly, love between friends, love for pets, blah blah. Everyone loves someone or something! And everyone or everything dies eventually. So, if someone is SO going to die because someone they love dies, then humans might have been exterminated 200 million years ago.

I am not trying to say that one should walk out of a relationship once he or she felt that something is wrong. The above advice is meant for people who are holding on to a relationship in which he or she has tolerated TOO MANY a times the SAME problem, and this problem has affected them SO much that it was MORE than ONCE it triggered off the "break up" word.

Wrong things happen for a reason too! Many relationships are strengthened because couples are able to make wrong things right.

Number 4 POA from AAM: Nothing's perfect in this world. No one's perfect too. Its just whether you are willing to accept the imperfectness in him or her.


Clause: All opinions and statements made here are highly subjective. Aunt Aggie is not legally liable for any advice taken too seriously.

Updates on Rara (Again)

Yoyo!

Here are the pics of Rara I took while she was hospitalised, as promised. My gal gal, so cute!

I tink the neck collar makes her look like a circus-rabbit.

Well, pple, she's recovering well. No worries! Thanks for all ya concerns and regards.

Oh yah, she was discharged yesterday. Now she's back in cosy home. Dr. Sue taught me all dat was needed to take care of her. So many things to do sia. Wah lau, so troublesome! Gotta clean left eye with saline, take out neck collar, cleanse wound with saline, wipe dry, apply cream, put powder, put back collar, tie collar and give her injections (for her eye lah, but not ON her eye lah, on the bum.) every other day. Not to mention gotta bond whenever possible, feed her, fill water bottle, clean cage... blah blah blah.

Where got time for dates then? I am SO gonna be a spinster. What makes it worse is dat I've just transferred my first month of deposit into "Spinster Funds" to "Rara's funds". Damn, I shd have studied Zoology.

What is a Spinster Fund?

I FINALLY came to my senses dat there is a HIGH chance dat I would not be able to find dat "someone" whom I want to depend on and spend the remaining of my lifetime with, so I decided dat the next best alternative would be to be a RICH and HC (high-class) spinster. Since I'm gonna die lonely, I choose to die RICH and lonely, as compared to POOR and lonely (so pathetic,I can't even buy a toy-boy). So I try to save a *significant amt of money every mth in preparation.

*Note: Definition of significant amt might vary from person to person.

Some more good news:

For those cold-blooded individuals who are starting to get bored reading about Rara everyday, I curse you... em, I mean, I am glad to tell you dat entries on Rara will be greatly reduced and other more interesting ones are expected to follow. Not dat Rara's not interesting though, juz dat I can understand dat not everyone is a caring animal-lover like me.

Also, I have decided to include an "Aunt Aggie Says" every month. Contents would mainly be interesting stories I've gathered in my many years of experience of counselling pple facing BGR problems. Exclusive to my blog readers only!

I am all ready to blog and blog again!

Photos! Photos! Photos!

I finally figured out how to get my pics here! *Pops champagne* And I did it all by myself! (K lah, k lah, got help lah. Thanks! Soo.)

Anyways, Yay!

Busy experimenting how to load pics...

Blog tmr k?

Sorry hah...

The Following Entry is ALL About Rara. Uninterested Parties, U are Welcome to Leave Now.

Ah ah! Gotcha! Did ch'ya attempt to mouse over to the "close window" icon or try to navigate away after seeing my title? huh? huh? You cold-blooded, impatient, conceited, uncaring, insensitive, self-centred ASSHOLE... Well, because of this, you are cursed. Haha...

For all of you little sweet angels who bothered to scroll down and willing to sacrifice a tinny winny bit of your time... I'm proud of you! And as a reward, you get... a LIMITED EDITION kiss from me! Muack! Haha.. assholes above! You gotta regret this!

K lah, I'm such a nice gal. For the benefit of those ungrateful KNS assholes, you can skip this section below and just scroll on.

************************************************
Updates on Rara
She's got better. Thank God. Her self-inflicted wound sort of dried up becoz it didn't come into contact with any of her saliva. Did I tell u guys dat Dr. Sue put a "collar" around her neck to prevent her from reaching her wound? Dat helped a lot actually. But I thought dat collar made Rara look a bit like a circus rabbit. Ha.Took some pics but can't show u all coz I haven had time to get a card reader to transfer all my hp pics here. Give me some time k? Will get it done by next mth.

Back to Rara. Met up with Dr. Chua at the clinic today. Remember her? Just to digress a bit hah, she called me last night just to check on how Rara's doing (she's only on duty on Tues and Sats) and how I was doing. So sweet of her! Guys, I'll help u chk out if she's hitched not, k? Such a nice gal, so caring, and vets earn good livings! Trust me, I've got Rara's medical fees as hard evidence. If interested, pls drop by at Simei Pet Safari, Animal Recovery Clinic, every Tues n Sats, 10am to 8pm. By the way, Dr. Chua told me she did some research on Rara's case (See? I told you she's damn nice.) and came up with a few reasons y Rara would self-inflict injury on herself. Half of the terms mentioned are too chim for me to understand lah. But I gathered dat the gist of it is:

1. Boredom. I might need to get her a toy or another rabbit to accompany her. Another rabbit might agonise her further if she doesn't like him/her (rabbits experience jealousy and rivalry too) and might fight. So, conclusion: Get a toy for her.

2. Mating Stage. Rara's in her stage of life where her hormones are highly active and she might be suffering from a condition of producing excessive hormones. This condition actually cause her to constantly tink dat she's pregnant and will consistant pull out her fur to make a nest. Solution: sterilise her. This way, we could prevent anything similar from happening in the future and her life span might be extended, if she's really suffering from this condition lah.

Haven decided whether I (or rather Rara) wanna go for the sterilisation not. Coz it simply means more money. Her fees are causing quite a financial strain on me. Speaking of which, I have an opening for a "Sugar Daddy/ Mummy" for my Rara. Just $50 a month. Free to visit/pet/ sayang / feed and play with her. Outings are allowed too but her curfew is 11pm. Muz bring back in good condition though. Your identity could be kept secret upon request. Any takers?

************************************************

Alright, here's the usual blogging.

Went back to work today. Cried myself to sleep last night and ended up with puffy eyes. No amount of make-up could cover up sia. Wah lau eh. So guys, better dun make your galfrens cry coz they get puffy eyes which no amount of Clinique concealer or SKII's Shen Qi Shui (miracle water) could revive.

Felt a lot better though. Might be because I slept more than 8 hrs last nite. Oh yah!My day was brightened coz I met a CUTE guy on the bus. *Wolf calls* Haha. God's gift to me. Yay! Got started on some real work but find it hard to concentrate coz my whole mind was on Rara. Had my first "net meeting" with my team leader who was working from hme. For the benefit of those who are as swa ku as me, a net meeting is like a net conference where you can see each other's desktop and read files from there. This way, you can communicate better coz both parties can refer to and visually see exactly which part of a file they are referring to. Cool hor? But becoz of poor concentration, I made a few mistakes. Luckily it was the first time and my team leader seems alright with it. I hope I didn't leave a bad impression. *crosses fingers*

Saw my uncle at work today. So weird! I'm so used to seeing him at Granny's plc! Well, he's a bit hostile I would say. As in I thot he might pop over to say hi or find me at the co's msn messenger to do so if he's shy lah. But he didn't. I tink it might be because he had a lot of work to clear after being away for a week. K lah, he's forgiven. I'm such a nice gal.

Everyone's been very concerned about my well-being and Rara. Even ex-colleague, JS, was so nice! Hey, to you pals out there, thanks!

Had another Yan Yu (romantic encounter) after visiting Rara today. Walked in an optical shop to get multi-purpose solution for my contacts and woohoo! *Wolf calls again* There was another CUTE GUY! He's one of the sales assistant there. Ladies and kaypoh gentlemen, if you all are interested, he's working at Frames and Lenses Optical Centre, Level 1, Simei, Eastpoint Shopping Centre. Statistics: About 1.78m, Chinese, Stylo, Clean Cut! My type! Haha. But then I tink my first and only conversation with him might have ruined all the good impression he might initially have of me. Here's how it goes:

Cute guy: Can I help you?

Me: Yes, how much is your multi-purpose solution?

Cute guy: $23 for the new one and $20 for the old one.

Me: Wat the difference?

Cute guy: The new one has more chlorine content in it and its supposed to be better for the eyes.

Me: Does it come with a free contacts container and a travel btl pack like this old one?

Cute guy: Sorry but no.

Me: Okie. I'll take the old one then.

I am a cheap-skate aunty! I bought the cheaper one coz it comes with free gifts. Yeah. But makes sense wat. Anyway I've used the old solution for like at least 5 years, and I can still see, so, who cares about more chlorine? And got free gifts somemore. Good deal leh. Besides, I wouldn't wanna risk letting cute guy have a good impression of me over getting a dressing down by Aunty Mummy! Who noes, the cute guy might tink I'm a smart buyer.

2 cute guys in a day! Boy, I am one lucky gal!

I Pray for my Darling Rara to Pull Through

I had the longest night ever.

The pain I experienced was comparable to those who lost loved ones in the Tsuami disaster. I watched my pet rabbit, Rara, inflict on herself wat was perhaps one of the Top 10 torture methods from ancient China. She was biting off her skin around her chest and neck, which was bare because of her previous action of pulling out all the fur. Blood flowed out like a waterfall with her every action. She struggled to escape everytime I tried to control her. No amount of distraction and coaxing could stop her. The bacteria infection, diagnosed by the vet, Dr. Chua, was causing her to itch and I could sense her struggle between her itch and the pain from torn skin. I thought she would recover slowly after Dr. Chua assured me that it was only a minor bacteria infection and that she is going to be alright after several applications of cream and antibotics. How was I to know, that the visit to the vet was just the beginning.

The effect of the anti-itch injection and cream had worn-off immediately when she reached home. Biting and scratching continued till there were blood stains all over the floor of my living room. She ignored my numerous callings and struggled to escape from my attempts to hold her. I was helpless. All I did was to pray and pray. Nothing helped. To make matters worse, I was alone at home. Mummy's working and won't be back till 1 am (it was only 7.30pm then), Ah Bui's in camp and scoundrel Dad was drinking himself dead at the coffeeshop downstairs. Mummy called and asked me to get scoundrel for help. I refused to. I'm too stubborn to do dat. And I predicted alcohol and merry-making would be more important to him as compared to a taumatised daughter and a dying rabbit. True enough, scoundrel did not come home till 12 plus, drunk. Commented on the massive pool of blood on the floor and ended with, "no wonder your mum called me just now." before heading towards his room and shut the door.

Nothing could have defeated more than wat happened last night. I was mentally drained and physically exhausted. All I did was cry, cry, cry. And pray, pray, pray. Nothing helped. It made matters worse when I called Dr. Chua at around 7.45 to seek for help. She was in the middle of a consultation but said she would call me back. Anxiety was the only word that could descibe the time that passed by before Dr. Chua called. This time, I had Rara bounded to a smaller area and I could control her geographically. But her biting and tuggling at her bare skin did not stop. The entire living room reeked of blood then.

15 eternal minutes passed and Dr. Chua still didn't call. I panicked and tried to call her again, only to realise that the clinic closes at 8pm! It was already 8.20pm then! Wild thoughts ran through my mind. Had Dr. Chua gone home? Would Rara die then?Wat could I do? At this instant, I saw this on the Animal Recovery Clinic, ARC, (this was the clinic I went to earlier)- After Hours Emergency Hotline: 6333 5550. I reacted faster than a bullet. Alex, the animal recovery centre hotline operator, attended to me. I was told that a Dr. Bryan Onn was supposed to be on duty today and dat Alex would get him to call me back. Damn. Call me back again. Sicali din call again, like Dr. Chua did, how?

Meanwhile, the telephone kept ringing. Mummy was calling home every other min from her work plc and Ah Bui was calling to check on Rara too. WL called to console and calm me every now and then too. I couldn't remember wat I said. I was just crying and crying. My entire mind was blank and all I could do was to cry and pray.

Then, Dr. Onn called! He called! My saviour! I broke down again. So paiseh, he muz have thot was I loser I was. He was very nice and gave me some advice as to wat to do. Nothing helped. Becoz Rara just refused to let me touch her at all. She would kick me with her hind legs and struggle tremendously. There were moments when I thot I might be doing her more harm than good. Perhaps I shd juz leave her alone. But I can't. As soon as I walked away, she started going at it again. Helplessness, helplessness and more helplessness.

Good heavens, Dr. Chua called back too! I was in a state of confusion coz she called while Dr. Onn was on the line n I was swtiching to and fro the 2 lines to get advice. All their advice failed because all of them needed me to be able to control and handle Rara. In the end, both of them said unanimously, " Sorry, there's nothing I can do to help then." I was crashed. I can't lose Rara like dat! How could I see her bite off her neck piece by piece and do nothing? Traumatisation reached the highest point at this very moment. Luckily, I realised that I could actually reduce her number of attempts to pull out her skin by petting and coaxing her slowly. I went ahead with this method for 4 hours. Staying by her side every min and sec. Occassionally leaving to clean up the blood stains around the house. I thot of sendign Rara to Dr. Onn'd clinic too. But he warned me that consultation after normal hours would cost me a hefty $165, excluding all the medicines and injections that could be needed.

Then Mummy came home. Her return sparked off more emotions in me as I started crying like a baby again. Her prescence relived a lot of my emotional distress though. We then took turns to coax and pet Rara, to reduce the number of times she tried to go at her wound again. Its was only then dat I could change out of my blood stained clothes and wash up because Mummy was watching her for me. I stayed vigil to her throughout the entire night, catching only minutes of sleep before I was startled by her actions again. I was straining my back, shoulders, arms and legs as I too struggled to do wat I thot was the very best for her.

Seconds felt like days, minutes felt like months and hours felt like years. The entire night felt like it lasted a lifetime to me. The clinic would only open at 10am in the morning, and I had to make sure that Rara could at least pull through till we bring her back to ARC. I dare not leave her alone for a single min. I kept myself awake and distracted her by talking to her. Reminding her of the times we had and how important she was to me. I also told her wat I was going to get her for Chinese New Year- a new cage. Talking about all these made me weep even more. I cried practically throughout the whole night. Tears are flowing down the very minute I am writing this.

Finally, my body couldn't take it anymore. I ran into a slight fever and was feeling very drowsy. It must have been the crying that led to this. I was physically exhausted and couldn't concentrate anymore. It was around 6.30am then and I decided that I was in no state to report for work. Informed whoever I had to inform and realised that I had to get at least some rest.

I called out to Mummy who took over my turn and went to bed reluctantly. I barely slept, all I had on my mind was Rara, Rara and Rara. I was worried Mummy couldn't handle her, coz Rara was so used to being handled by me. I then dozed off and woke up at 9.20am. Immediately checked on Rara and realised dat her condition hasn't worsen too much. But right now I could see her internal muscles and neck bone. Her plight made my heart stopped beating and cause a sudden stiffness in my entire body. After a quick wash up, both me and Mummy were on our way to save her.

Back at ARC, we had to wait for Dr. Sue to complete a surgery. So we were advised to leave Rara there for 15 mins while we took some food. I did not consume anything since 2pm yesterday. Had some quick prata and rushed back to the clinic when they called to say Dr. Sue was ready.

Dr. Sue examined Rara and diagnosed dat her situation was pretty bad. It is best for us to hospitalise her coz we needed professional help in cleaning her wound every now and then and change her dressing. Dr. Sue advised dat perhaps surgery might be needed to get her torn skin back together but she would proceed with that after observation for about 3 days. If Rara's skin showed signs of healing before that, then perhaps surgery would not be needed. However, Dr. Sue did not promise us that Rara's gonna recover. She said that there is also a possibility dat Rara would not pull through. It all depends. For the time being, I juz have to jostle between office, home and clinic everyday.

Some of you might tink that all the physical, metal and monetary efforts dat I've invested in a mere rabbit is so worthless and meaningless. "She's couldn't even talk! Or respond to you! She's just a rabbit! Get another one if she die lah! Chey! So much trouble for one rabbit!"

Maybe some of you might not understand but she is definitely more than a pet to me. She's family. No one could ever understand how much she looks fwd to my return from home everyday and vice versa. How much joy and laughter she bought into my life, how she would "listen to and share" all my nonsense and sorrows in this house, how much I've become used to her dat life's simply not gonna be the same anymore without her. She has given me more than wat a friend could have given.

Maybe Mummy's right. I shouldn't have agreed to Ah Bui bringing her back because I would grow so attached to her dat I am not able to let her go anymore. This is exactly the situation I got myself in right now. I cannot let go. I truly understand dat all living things die one day and dat I gonna live on even without her. But, this is so hard, so so hard. I am so defeated. Life is harsh.

Note: I am going into a state of emotional unstability now and please try to make this easier for me by getting the details through this blog and not ask me again personally, k? Thanks.

Sneak Preview!

Ah hah! Tah dah.... my first entry!

Everybody! (in my usual slang.) Now u guys and gals have an avenue of getting updates about me, anytime, anywhere. But dat doesn't mean u pple can forget about contacting me personally! But if u refuse to, there's nothing i can do anyway. Pretty gals usually get ostracized... ; )

Before I ever get started on anything, i tink i had better indicate this clause and remind you pple. " Characters, places, scenarios and comments found in this blog might be fictitious. Any similarities to anyone, living or dead, mentioned in this blog is purely coincidental."

Alright, now i can start.